[It's been a façade from the very start. His friends needed him to be strong, and so Akira was. They needed him to be their pillar, their strength, but what they never realized is that what fortified him were the bonds they shared together. Without them... well. Ann can see the result with her own two eyes.]
Really, I'm fine.
[It's become natural to lie, to pretend he's fine when he isn't. That poker face is one Akira wears well, but it's a heavy, cumbersome thing. He could bear that weight when it served a purpose, but what friends remain with him here on this island no longer need to rely upon him for his strength.
They've all found other purposes, other sources of strength, other people to tie themselves to. So it goes, and so it shouldn't bother him... and yet it does.]
You never got to see this side of me before, did you? Guess I'm grateful for that, but there's no hiding it now.
[Exposing his deepest darkest fears to Ann is no easier the second time around, but this is the woman he loves. If anyone deserves the effort, it's her.]
[ Ann listens quietly, watching Akira's face as he makes an admission that's obviously difficult for him. It makes sense, in hindsight, that this would be something he feared. He'd been ousted from his home, but through the wringer of the legal system for a crime he didn't commit. Of course it makes sense that he would be afraid of being left alone.
But... ]
You aren't alone, Akira. I'm here with you, remember? I love you. I'm not going to leave you behind.
That's what does him in. Akira could've kept himself afloat if not for those words– ones he's heard her speak before, albeit in a different time and place. Akira remains smiling, that mask of his well-worn and sturdy... yet it betrays him and slips. Ann speaks those words to him and Akira can't keep that smile from slipping away, turning his face to one side and burying it in the palm of his hand.
I'm not going to leave you behind. He remembers her speaking those words to him as well. Back then, he'd also lapsed into tears when she promised to remain by his side no matter how difficult the road ahead got. He'd been weak, weary, and so very afraid... but she remained by his side anyway.]
[ Silence falls in the room again, save for that eerie sound of howling wind as it catches on the corners of the building and rattles the windows. Ann exhales a long sigh through her nose, her features grim as she takes Akira's wrist in one hand and his chin in the other and all but forces him to look at her. ]
Because ... why, exactly? Like if I see you feeling scared or lonely, I'll think you're a loser or something? Like that wasn't the way I was feeling when you chased me down and made me spill my guts to you?
[ Her grip loosens to something gentler, thumb running over his cheek. ]
Come on, don't be ridiculous. Having those feelings just means you're a human being. I already know you're strong and brave. Like, duh. But seeing you this way... it makes me feel closer to you, because I know that you feel those same things I've felt. Besides, isn't being brave more about doing the things that scare you than not being afraid at all?
[No, don't look at him cry. It's unsightly at best, but Akira doesn't wrench out of Ann's grip. Knowing full well he'd suffer the brunt of her ire and concern alike, he doesn't dare.
So watch your boyfriend weep, Ann. Watch, because he's never going to get much uglier than this, sniffling and working very very hard to keep his nose from running. Guh.]
Crying isn't very cool.
[And Morgana isn't here to assure Akira that he is, in fact, very cool. Just another thing to cry about!! All the same, Akira's smile returns just a bit, his hands coming up to frame Ann's face.]
You really are my Ann. I've read girls like a sensitive guy, but when it comes down to it, no one likes being blubbered on.
[Except, perhaps, his darling girlfriend. Turning his face to one side, Akira kisses her palm. Turning it once more, he kisses the other.]
[ To prove her point, she pulls him in towards her and kisses his wet cheeks. It's true, too--she does think he's cool, and she thinks it's also cool to be able to be honest about your feelings with the person you love.
Her lips find his in a chaste kiss as she bundles him up in her arms, pulling the blankets around them to keep the rest of their pooled body heat from escaping into the chilly room. ]
I want you to feel okay being vulnerable with me, because I love you a lot.
[ But she also wants to help him feel better, too, so if there's any way she can do that, she will. ]
[Stop, comforting him is his kink??? Wreathed in her kisses, Akira smiles, chuckling warmly in her tender touch. Folding into her arms feels so natural, so warm and tender, and Akira wraps his arms snug around Ann's waist.]
I love you too. I'd be hard pressed not to.
[Nuzzling against her neck, Akira kisses her there... bites her there too. Comfort comes in all sorts of shapes and forms, doesn't it? He could use some of the more salacious variety.]
[ Ann gasps softly when Akira's teeth dig into the sensitive skin of her neck, shuddering as it fills her body with heat--a pleasant distraction from the cold outside. His wordless request is understood. If this is what he wants, she's pleased to give it to him. ]
Akira... how do you want it?
[ Her face turns bright red at the question, even though he's seen her naked before. They've had sex before. She supposes this is just what it's like to talk to the person you're crushing on. ]
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 12:16 am (UTC)Really, I'm fine.
[It's become natural to lie, to pretend he's fine when he isn't. That poker face is one Akira wears well, but it's a heavy, cumbersome thing. He could bear that weight when it served a purpose, but what friends remain with him here on this island no longer need to rely upon him for his strength.
They've all found other purposes, other sources of strength, other people to tie themselves to. So it goes, and so it shouldn't bother him... and yet it does.]
You never got to see this side of me before, did you? Guess I'm grateful for that, but there's no hiding it now.
[Exposing his deepest darkest fears to Ann is no easier the second time around, but this is the woman he loves. If anyone deserves the effort, it's her.]
I'm afraid of being alone. Terrified.
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 01:16 am (UTC)But... ]
You aren't alone, Akira. I'm here with you, remember? I love you. I'm not going to leave you behind.
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 01:37 am (UTC)That's what does him in. Akira could've kept himself afloat if not for those words– ones he's heard her speak before, albeit in a different time and place. Akira remains smiling, that mask of his well-worn and sturdy... yet it betrays him and slips. Ann speaks those words to him and Akira can't keep that smile from slipping away, turning his face to one side and burying it in the palm of his hand.
I'm not going to leave you behind. He remembers her speaking those words to him as well. Back then, he'd also lapsed into tears when she promised to remain by his side no matter how difficult the road ahead got. He'd been weak, weary, and so very afraid... but she remained by his side anyway.]
I don't want you to see me this way.
[I don't want anyone to.]
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 01:49 am (UTC)Because ... why, exactly? Like if I see you feeling scared or lonely, I'll think you're a loser or something? Like that wasn't the way I was feeling when you chased me down and made me spill my guts to you?
[ Her grip loosens to something gentler, thumb running over his cheek. ]
Come on, don't be ridiculous. Having those feelings just means you're a human being. I already know you're strong and brave. Like, duh. But seeing you this way... it makes me feel closer to you, because I know that you feel those same things I've felt. Besides, isn't being brave more about doing the things that scare you than not being afraid at all?
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 02:58 am (UTC)So watch your boyfriend weep, Ann. Watch, because he's never going to get much uglier than this, sniffling and working very very hard to keep his nose from running. Guh.]
Crying isn't very cool.
[And Morgana isn't here to assure Akira that he is, in fact, very cool. Just another thing to cry about!! All the same, Akira's smile returns just a bit, his hands coming up to frame Ann's face.]
You really are my Ann. I've read girls like a sensitive guy, but when it comes down to it, no one likes being blubbered on.
[Except, perhaps, his darling girlfriend. Turning his face to one side, Akira kisses her palm. Turning it once more, he kisses the other.]
Thank you for loving me. Tears and all.
no subject
Date: 2020-12-14 04:06 am (UTC)[ To prove her point, she pulls him in towards her and kisses his wet cheeks. It's true, too--she does think he's cool, and she thinks it's also cool to be able to be honest about your feelings with the person you love.
Her lips find his in a chaste kiss as she bundles him up in her arms, pulling the blankets around them to keep the rest of their pooled body heat from escaping into the chilly room. ]
I want you to feel okay being vulnerable with me, because I love you a lot.
[ But she also wants to help him feel better, too, so if there's any way she can do that, she will. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-12-15 03:02 am (UTC)I love you too. I'd be hard pressed not to.
[Nuzzling against her neck, Akira kisses her there... bites her there too. Comfort comes in all sorts of shapes and forms, doesn't it? He could use some of the more salacious variety.]
two months later...
Date: 2021-02-18 06:42 am (UTC)Akira... how do you want it?
[ Her face turns bright red at the question, even though he's seen her naked before. They've had sex before. She supposes this is just what it's like to talk to the person you're crushing on. ]