Open Thread / Overflow

[pussy_whip]

You know what to do.

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[pussy_whip]

[ Ann would honestly have to be a pretty cold person to ignore that kind of plea. Hurt as she was--and still is--by his words, she's willing to mend that bridge. He reached out, and that takes guts after saying what he had.

But there's still one thing she needs to hear. ]

Say you're sorry, and then you can call.

[ Because "I regret" and "I'm sorry" aren't quite the same thing, are they? Similar feelings, similar sentiments, but one is an apology and the other isn't. ]

[jokey]

[And cheapen the value of I'm sorry with something as dispassionate as a text message? No. Allow Akira this final act of audaciousness.]

I refuse. Answer my call and I'll speak the words aloud.

[Ring ring.]

[pussy_whip]

[ Sighing, she lets it ring a few times before she lets the call come through. ]

Hello?

[ Akira might also hear a trilling, squeaky noise. Ann has one of the little dragons with her. ]

[jokey]

[Ah, the old "three rings" rule. Wouldn't want to sound eager to talk to him, would she? Akira clears his throat and sits himself up straight on the other end of the line while he waits for her to pick up.]

I'm sorry, Ann. I'm sorry for lying to you. I'm sorry for saying things I didn't mean to say. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings.

[HUFF, HUFF. But wait, there's more! A beat–]

I'm sorry I'm not Ren.

[pussy_whip]

I... I accept your apology. But one of those things isn't something you have to be sorry for, dummy. Your name isn't Ren, but... you're the same, aren't you? Your heart is the same as his, right?

Except for... well...

[jokey]

Yes. Except for how he felt about you.

I asked you who I was to you. "One of my best friends," you said. "Our leader." Hearing that, I was shocked.

[I was hurt more than I cared to admit. Somehow, it doesn't feel right to confess to the deepest depths of his very private pain– not to the girl who remembers him only as a close friend, a reliable leader. As she should, and yet there's something missing. Something vital.

To her, he's only ever been someone to confide in. Akira's burdens are his own to bear in silence, but back home, Ann was his... no. It doesn't matter anymore.]

I shouldn't have been. If ending up here is a possibility, so too are mismatched memories. Taking my confusion out on you wasn't right.

[pussy_whip]

How was I supposed to know how you felt? I was shocked, too, y'know. I'd already met two different versions of Ren who said I was just a friend to them, and then you came along and acted like you actually wanted me one minute then like I was a crazy person the next.

[ Her voice cracks a little on that last word, sniffling once. ]

I'd worked so hard to respect his wishes. To be okay with him loving someone else. It really hurt, but I thought, as long as he's happy, I can be happy, too. Then when you showed up, it gave me hope, but you turned around and snatched it right back.

[jokey]

I do want you!

[Spoken emphatically, Akira very nearly cuts Ann off. He'd take a moment to compose himself, to suck down a much needed breath, but Akira doesn't. Akira can't. He hangs onto his composure by a mere thread, refusing to let his voice wobble or his teeth grind in frustration.

Then you came along and gave me hope. On the other end of the line, Joker shoves his glasses up and pinches the bridge of his nose, a headache brewing in either temple.]

I don't care how they felt. I'm not them, and I never will be. All I can confirm for you his how I feel, and I–

[God damn it. That thread very nearly snaps clean in twain, but Akira composes himself. Sucks down that much needed breath.]

I loved you. I loved you from the very start.

[pussy_whip]

I love you too, okay? God.

[ Why is this so difficult? ]

Where are you?

[jokey]

[Why indeed. Akira's silent on the other end of the line for a good, long minute, noticeably subdued when he speaks up anew.]

Maruki's.

[Home, in other words.]

[pussy_whip]

Well... wait there. I'm coming over.

[jokey]

Okay.

[okay.............. he's just going to... wash his face, lay in bed, and stare vacantly at the ceiling until Ann gets here. When she does, he'll be there to open the door for her, uncertainties mounting. God damn it, he's going to get yelled at, isn't he.]

[pussy_whip]

[ When Ann shows up, she's bundled up in a long trench coat that seems to hang off her frame in some ways while pinching in others. Clearly, this wasn't designed for an hourglass figure like hers. A scarf is wrapped around her neck, pulled up even over her chin and her cheeks. It's cold out here, dammit.

When the door opens, she pushes right in, under Akira's arm if she has to. Then she turns to face him, pulling down the scarf so more of her face than her eyes and her furrowed brow can be seen. ]

Okay, I'm here. Now... say it again. The... the thing you said before.

[jokey]

[Never mind the fact that she's dressed in a men's coat– it's cold as shit and Akira's ushering her inside, a hand planted firmly on the curve of her back.

...rather, he'd have helped her inside of Ann didn't help herself, muscling right past him. Dumbfounded, Akira stands on the threshold, very nearly shutting the door on his fingertips. Ah. She's definitely mad.]

I'm sorry?

[That's it, isn't it? The thing he said before. One of several things he said before, but a thing all the same.]

[pussy_whip]

No. I mean, yes, that's good, but... The other thing.

[ Her cheeks, already chapped from the frosty winds turn a deeper crimson color, and she fidgets where she stands. It's hard to read her mood from her expression and body language--she mostly seems guarded, but there's an eagerness to her as well. ]

The last thing you said.

[jokey]

[Ah, that. It's right back to killing him softly, isn't it? Akira keeps his sighs contained, burying his hands in his pockets and eyeing Ann quietly.]

I loved you.

[Saying this again is like driving the edge of a blade into his heart, but hey. The things he does for his social links.]

[pussy_whip]

... Past tense?

[ That wasn't how it sounded, but she has to confirm it. One way or another, she has to know how he really feels. She looks up at him with her turquoise eyes, taking a step closer to him. ]

[jokey]

Present tense.

[There aren't many things he struggles with as badly as he does with the weight of his own feelings. They're cumbersome things, things he'd rather not balance when Ann's feelings are heavy enough a load, but alas.

Alas, he owes the girl he loves a window into his soul that he'd fully anticipated never opening again. Scrubbing at the back of his neck, Akira takes hold of Ann's hand and laces their fingers together, guiding her through the quaint apartment and into his dingy little bedroom.]

Past, present, and future. I've loved you for a while now.

[Akira's bedroom door eases open with a groan. He guides Ann inside, the room cleaned and straightened out where once it had been a dark, dusty mess. The foul weather's robbed them of electricity, and so Akira keeps a bundle of candles glowing on the nightstand beside his bed. He sits her down on that creaky old mattress and settles beside her.]

I thought it would be easier if I didn't. Then you wouldn't have to worry about this island's demands.

[pussy_whip]

[ This room is nothing like Ren's room at Leblanc, but it's got kind of the same energy, doesn't it? An abandoned space made livable again, sparsely decorated at first, but she's sure he'll soon begin to decorate it with tokens and gifts--all the little items his friends will give him.

She lets him lead her inside, sitting on the bed when he nudges her. Her body leans in towards his, both out of affection for him and to seek the warmth of his body. ]

What about what I think? You can't just make that kind of decision on your own without even asking me how I feel about it first. I'm not gonna lie to you and say I haven't been with a couple of people here on the island, but I don't feel the same way about them that I do about you.

[ His admission of love is an undeniable rush. It's so strong that it makes her shiver just a bit, as if from lingering cold. ]

I--I love you, too! [ Why does she sound so angry? ] I really love you! Like, really really.

[jokey]

You don't have to yell...

[Ah, he's feeling the love like one feels an anvil collide with their skull. Ann sidles closer and Akira leans back to nab the woolen blanket on his bed, tossing it around their shoulders. For good measure, he threads his hand around Ann's waist and brings her just a little closer.]

If you really really love me, I believe you. [But do feel free to add more reallys for emphasis.] And I'm grateful. The idea of losing you was devastating.

[pussy_whip]

It kinda felt like I had to yell.

[ She grumbles a little but when he drapes his blanket around her she seems pacified. He’ll feel her relax gradually, letting her body rest against his with a low sigh. The lingering sting of his words is starting to fade, and she loves him enough that it’s easy to forgive him for being a dumb teenage boy when he holds her like this. ]

You haven’t lost me. I promise.

[jokey]

If it makes you feel better, I won't stop you.

[That's better, isn't it? No yelling, no shouting, no threatening him with the daggers hidden in those pretty turquoise eyes. Tugging that blanket taut around them, Akira nuzzles into the soft sweep of Ann's hair, encourages her to rest her cheek against his shoulder.]

It's a little cold in here. Sorry about that. We lost power around the time the blizzard began.

[pussy_whip]

That’s all right. You’ll keep me warm, won’t you?

[ If her meaning isn’t clear enough, she leans in just a bit more and kisses the pulse in his throat. She won’t push for anything, of course, but it’s an olive branch, as if to say that she’s there for him if and when he needs her. ]

[jokey]

Isn't that what boyfriends do?

[And she'll feel his pulse kick up a notch beneath her pliant lips, laughter warm and rumbling in his throat. That's an olive branch he'll happily reach out towards, dancing the tips of his fingers along the curve of Ann's jaw and leading her up into a kiss.]

Let's lay down. This bed's much warmer when you're in it.

[I could use some comfort.]

[pussy_whip]

[ She kisses Akira with a contented sigh, slipping out of the borrowed coat and scarf before lying down with him, pillowing her head on his shoulder. This really is much better; it feels like an immense weight has been lifted from her shoulders. ]

You're such a sweet talker. [ Not that she minds. ] God, I'm so glad that's over with, though. I've been so stressed out--even eating crepes hasn't helped me feel better.